<--iTsSumMerTiMe-->

Hello fellow friends,
It is now summer time! I am thrilled...time for new tan lines, getting more fit, trying new foods, seeing a new culture, and making new goals.
I have quite a list already...here goes nothing.
--Make a great effort, despite working, and spending time with my friends, to spend quality time with my family.
--WORK OUT. A LOT.
--Show my friends that I genuinely care (yes, even if it is over skype ;) )
--get off the NET and get out in the world! there is so much I can be doing!
--work and SAVE my $.
--Read a lot of books.
--Adventure around.
--Put things into boxes...organize.
--Keep things clean.
--Get.away.from.coffee.
--Dance in the rain.
--Complete the list of things that my friends and I made.
--Grow.super.deep.with.Jesus.
--Love and do not hold back.

Okay well, there's a great start to be working on.
In almost 4 days I leave for Panama. Keep my team and I in your prayers...PLEASE! we will highly appreciate it.
Thank you so much.

Peace..xoxo,
rebestah

I have a week...

whoa. time literally flies. i have been babysitting...cleaning....studying...et cetera since i posted!
last saturday i posted about me writing my essay. that went well...only four points off! i was very happy when i saw my grade.
anyway...so it has been a crazy week. i have been: praying for calmed nerves (PANAMA IN A WEEK), studying my heart out, taking tests, watching the bachelorette, talking about hard things, praying for people, reading a lot of "Something Borrowed", reading bible verses, RUNNING, and spending time with my class.
and all of this to say...the school year is over. i am done. i am a senior...and in a year i will be embarking the next part of my life. crazy..but true.

anyway..moving onto my heading...i have a week. a week for preparing. a week to be praying.hard. a week to be studying the scriptures. a week to be trusting. a week to be packing. a week for working hard. a week to be trying to sleep. a week to be making money. a week to be spending it all for panama. a week to be...listening.
please be praying for my heart..and open ears and hearts of the panamanians. i greatly appreciate it.

well...off to a week of: little kids soccer camp, working, packing, and prayerfully listening.
LOVE YOU ALL.
~rebstah

 essay day!

  i love bsitting the viriginias! (and they love the WILD)!

 chilling @ the virginias.

 after a wonderful run in the rain...don't you love the socks?

a great saturday...fueled by a cup of coffee! 

you then, be STRENGTHENED by grace

Paul speaks through Jesus in Colossians, saying "You then, be strengthened by grace."
to be strengthened means to: get stronger, learn more, be renewed.
i love how paul said: by grace. what i am getting out of this is...we get weak so easily by our sins every single day. we need to get strengthened and renewed..by.grace.alone.
and it is also a command! "YOU THEN, BE STRENGTHENED BY GRACE."
it is of high importance..so today..be strengthened by the grace that God so freely gives when we ask of it.

Peace.

Rainy, study, starbizucks sorta day..

so i love this aspect about where my house is located..it is a half mile from a starbucks. my inspiration, my love, my mmm...
so yes, i am at starbucks right now. i am just finishing up my AP analysis paper right now..and i am moving onto studying for other finals. i have a huge pile of work..it is a rainy rainy day..and i love rain..and i am studying and i am drinking a venti soy-vanilla latte. so so good. sometimes i think there is nothing better.

yesterday was a crazy day..ashley and i headed over to the OC house after school, and we watched the three crazy boys. and also had some catch up time over a cup of coffee : ). and we did finger paint with the little boys! so much fun. i loved it.
then after the OCs, i went over to the westphal house and watched sam and andrew (yes, two babysitting jobs in one day..and back to back). we had a lot of fun. i brought over the finger paint to their house, and we did some of that...chased each other around the house...and after that they were pooped man. so they wanted to watch a movie..and we watched Gulliver's Travels! such a good movie. then they went to bed...and i fell asleep on the couch. the parents came back around 1215 and they had to wake me up..ha ha ha. too funny. then i drove home...got ready for bed...and i was out. cold. turkey.
i had set my alarm for 840...and somehow slept through the super loud alarm and woke up @ 1030. i took a shower, got ready, and came here. and after i am done with all of these things i am going to a grad party..then to sunni's dance recital!
ta ta for now!
xoxo,
rebecca

My heart burns, my heart burns for this love, for you...kara.doten.

We will live

We give our lives, claim you as King. We are your servants, and before you we bow. With every breath we make this vow: We will live to worship; give you praise, with all our hearts, for all our days. Father we want to do what you created us to do, we will live to worship You.
~Joy Williams

i'll tell you about my terrific tuesday....

so I got up early..picked up Caribou for my little math class..got to school and we all studied for the math test today. Then we had chemistry..then english..and i signed a million yearbooks, then history..a power point...outside for lunch! then bible class..then the math test..it went good!..then span class...did dialoges (moriah and i wrote ours in 4 minutes..bam)! then it was study hall! signing yearbooks pretty much summed it up. Then l, l, and i walked out of school and enjoyed the super pretty weather! i drove down to lifeway, got a new bible, went to mckidies to redeem my free coupon, picked my SISSY UP!!! (saw her for the first time since she got back)!!!...then we went to target..went home..and she made me pasta. now we are listening to jack johnson...seriously a beautiful night/day.

I am praying for peace as I get ready to embark for Panama. There are so many things I can worry about...but I am choosing not to. I know the God of the UNIVERSE knows my path and what will happen. That is beyond good enough for me. That is the best.
Happy Tuesday!
Peace.

take up your cross and walk.....

this may sound like a weak crutch...a weak thing to say...but i am taking up the cross of giving up coffee (little by little of COURSE). and it is HARD. seriously...head ache...adhd to the max (coffee has the reverse affect on me...i become less hyper and more focused..makes a lot of sense, right)?
so today i was all over the place...and now i am paying for a half tumbler full of coffee this morning (and i did not even DRINK all of it)! oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh. i am so addicted! it is horrible!
the reason for me getting rid of this addiction is for my upcoming Panama mission trip. My team and I leave on the fourth of June (which is VERY soon)! and i know they have extremely great coffee, but because of the heat...and the fact that coffee already dehydrates you...not a good combination. i need to get this crutch out (even though I dearly LOVE coffee)! i am not quite sure if i will go back to coffee or stay off it when i get home. we'll have to see.
anyway..for now i am saying night night and sleep tight tight.
Pecae.

mm..saturday.

today was a pleasant surprise. rainy. cool...a john mayer kind of day (i took him everywhere with me today).
i got up at a reasonable hour this morning. around 830. i took a shower. ate a bagel with peanut butter, and drank my morning coffee.
i processed to cleaning my room..putting away clothes..ect.
i returned a red box, went to starbucks, picked up chipotle for sunni & i, and then i tutored.
sunni worked super hard today, and we got a lot accomplished!
then i picked up dinner for my parents, went home, quickly ate, and then went to Something Borrowed with l&l. we had a good time. the movie was very good.

i played carlitos today..i just love time with my guitar. time to get out all of the feelings i have bottled..all of the thoughts i cannot rid of my mind..so soothing. if i was on a desert island alone for a week..i would take my bible, journal, a book arts&crafts, yogi tea, viola, and guitar. enough said.

i am going to do some yoga..go to sleep..and work with little kiddies tomorrow morning! missed them last week!

 Messing with the mac!

 I HEART YOGI TEA!

Peace.

catching.up.wit.u.

hi! so i am going to give you a book of my life, starting from my birthday. until now. yea. enjoy.

 Birthday morning! I had a delightful breakfast with my dad, and a wonderful day over all!

 I thought I thunk I needed a hair cut.

You know how you crave chocolate? yea..well, I also have this other random craving of gummy worms. Literally.

LOVE my green monster smoothies!

 FORMAL was on Saturday! It was a beautiful day!

Love my parents : ).

 Starbucks..promoting a better YOU!

 Chilling @ the McKown house!

the lovely cjjj : )

 What? It was a rainy day, and I needed motivation. I loveee.

 Ending the crazy day with a nice warm cup of Passion fruit tea = amazing.

My AMAZING sissy!!!!! So proud she has graduated and gotten her Bachelor's degree! 

She will be going to Mannes School of Music in New York City in the fall for her Master's Degree. SO PROUD!

well..there you have it. all caught up.

Peace.

creating space

i was at a place of comfort

i thought i could trust you again in minimal amounts.

i was gluing my pieces back into parts, my parts into a whole

it was making sense; it felt okay

unfortunately

i am uncomfortable

i am hurt

i am broken into parts, which are in pieces

that are smaller, harder to fit together, more time consuming to work with

it hurts so bad to see this crumble

your simple and thoughtless actions, words and attitude are negative.

i do not appreciate it.

you are just who you were. i can read you like a book.

it is so hard to hear you say:

"give me time..we will talk things through."

i do not think it is worth it

you are showing nothing that promotes:

worth, care, or friendship at all

i am trying..

to be your friend

to not react harshly

to be patient

to be kinder than necessary

to be Godly and discerning through all of this..

it is so difficult.

i am creating space..again.

journaling..

Dear God, I am thankful for all of the examples of beautiful hearts that you have put into my life. Dear butt cramp, GO AWAY! I have been fricken stretching all day for goodness sakes! Dear gummy worms, Why do I crave you? Why are you so addicting? Dear clouds, thanks for being humorous with the kids I nanny today. Dear A C, I miss you woman! Dear nature, I love connecting with you.. Dear yoga, why is it so hard to find time for you? Dear 17, you are a scary year already. Dear carlitos, you have a way of making my blues go away! (carlitos is my guitar..just for the memo). Dear birthday cards, you are so fun to place and put up around my room. Dear cinnamon life, would you care to come to school with me? Dear gun safety, you give me more homework than my teachers @ school give. Dear time, I want you to slow down and speed up all @ the same time. Dear sister, I cannot believe you graduate in less than a week! Dear bed, let's sleep good tonight. k?

en paz.

reflecting again.

well i know it is 5/2 and it is like a million peoples' birthday today..(including mine)..i officially turned 17 @ 709 tonight. and i had a great group of people help me celebrate that! (i will make another blog post about that some other time).

i..am going to talk about something a little more important.
osama bin laden.
i got a text last night while i was journaling..about to go to sleep. my sister told me to turn the news on. head lines every where. announcements constantly. it was a something that usa was praising over.
that...on the the other hand was not my first reaction.
i did not praise. i did not rejoice. as many of you know..i do not condone war. my family does not condone war (with a few exceptions) but..it is just not something we think is even worth it.
yes, this man caused pain and heartache and death to our country. yes, that is not right. yes, that is wrong. yes..it is hard to even digest that..
but as a christian..i don't think we're to rejoice over someones death..especially if odds are bin laden is in hell today.
people were outside the white house last night cheering..drinking..holding their pride in usa. sinning.
all of this is leading us into more destruction? can we not see? of course not, we are BLINDED!
i am going to pose this question..answer in comments if you would like..and you can disagree if you have a differing opinion.
here's my question: why are we so judging and condescending of others...praising their death..when we ultimately deserve death just as rightfully?
when we do stuff like this we are basically putting sins at different levels (that is a different conversation and i think that is true to some degree)..but sin is sin people! if i steal my friends' pencil i deserve death. God created each man in his own image. i do not care if they are muslim, islamic...from the middle east...chinese..God made every individual different..each of our minds are created with His divine power..and I just do not understand how we can rejoice over someone's death who has been created in God's image.
I am still wrestling with this..and it is hard to know that there is a high risk of retaliation, too. this cycle seems to never end. and that's why my ultimate wish is for nuclear weapons to be abolished...because they are abolishing us.
Please comment! I would love to hear your thoughts.

Peace.