to keep myself sane.

i know it's late..but honestly i need to keep myself sane. put my never ending thoughts somewhere.
not that these thoughts are necessarily bad, but they just need to be put somewhere else, too.

#1) i have been growing so much in my faith lately. i find myself listening to christian music more often/singing it more often. i told one of my good friends the other day "you know, i have never realized how much i have appreciated ktis until this year." she had the same exact response. we both hadn't listened to it like at all.
also, i have been making a conscious effort to read my bible or at the minimum read crazy love every single day. i realized that my prayers that put me to sleep and wake me up each morning..just.don't.cut.it. i have been growing so much.
#2) anne jackson is kind of my hero. a woman of utter worth, and someone..who understands a lot of people who feel alone. a woman who was addicted to porn. now, your mind is probably thinking girls don't get addicted to porn. never!
but seriously, it is just as much of a struggle for girls as it is guys. like she explains in this video, it's a natural thing for guys to be addicted to porn, but it seems so weird for a girl to be. just watch this story and you'll be amazed. just like i was. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDAuLyHqAdE
#3) i miss hawaii. i miss warm weather. i am kind of sick of school. i am so excited for summer.

Peace

wow!

so i haven't updated in forever people! i am safe and sound in mn.
my trip to hawaii was wonderful. seriously loved it.
i got some kona coffee to bring home, chocolate covered macadamia nuts, ect.
it was so great to be able to see God's beautiful paintings across the sky while i was there. the people were so accepting of who you were...seriously no one judges there. love.
anyway, allie and i went to lifetime today and WORKED OUT. felt amazing! I came home to my mom gone @ a meeting, and my dad still on his trip (aka a house with no one else home). i usually like people around, to socialize with...but every once and a while it's nice to have the house to myself. i made pasta and pesto, and drank oj. then i turned on american idol! i am shocked by tonights' results!! i am thrilled, though.

i just also want to give a shout out to the person who reached out to me this week...(even if it was in a bathroom). i think some misunderstandings and other things have made us not see each other for like EVER! you know who you are and i love you : )).

ok peace out girl scouts.

I LOVE IT HERE

well it is day two in hawaii. only six10 am here (so weird that it is 1110 at home right now). but anyway, i am loving this weather...and currently, i am watching the sun slowly creep above the horizon. so pretty.
yesterday my mom and i went to the beach while my dad was in his confrence (poor guy), and we lubed up like crazy and we are BURNT. but i guess that's the life of norwegian skined people.
after we sunned for a while, we walked across the street, and found a sushi place. we got rainbow sushi after a recommendation of it, and i also got a mango bubble tea! so good.

now it is 7am and we have been watching the sunrise. and we just got room service delivered, and i am drinking a super super good smoothie with a boost of protein! so delish.
this is going to make for a very good day at the pool : ).

mango bubble tea!

room service!

<3, rebs

it's legit.

I am leaving this home. I am leaving this cold weather. I am ready for something new.
I have some very long flights today. That is ok, I am so excited.
luaus, getting tan, drinking coconuts, seeing palm trees...ect.
have you figured out where i'm going yet?

love, me

i am officially on break.

dear spring break, you are a blessing.
dear cold, you are not.
dear girls night, bubble tea spilling all over the car could not get more funny.
dear japanians, you are in my prayers.
dear oc's, i loved hanging out with you yesterday. made my week.
dear destination, i am so happy for you. i can hardly wait to hop on a plane.
dear francis chan, your book "crazy love" is changing my life.
dear pile of clean clothes, get ready to be packed!
dear peace, i am so thankful for you and i wish there was more of you in the world.
dear yoga, you are helping me stay strong and healthy.

love, me

4 days! four stinking long days. i am so excited! i am so close but so so far....

so there is this kid in my class (unnamed), who got every person in my class sick.
thank you, we love you.

peace

"Turn from evil and do good; seek PEACE and pursue it."
--Psalm 34:14

you wonder why I have such a "promoting peace" mindset?

One week. Seven days. 168 hours. 10,080 minutes. 604,800 seconds.
That is how close I am to being in paradise.
I am so so excited. It is actually not too far off considering the time I will be leaving next sunday morning.

<3 you!

study study study!

I am drinking some decaf and studying! wish me luck on my chemistry test!

make some memories..

i was reading a magazine yesterday...and i was reading this very intriguing article about making memories. it said that people who spend money on an experience RATHER than stuff enjoy more of life--and feel more satisfied with their purchase.
making memories are what piece life together. if we just bought things all the time would we be happy? not really. even if we buy things with people we love, does that thing really last?
i am always willing to pay for a breakfast, a coffee date, a trip, a road trip...something where i get to spend quality time with people. an experience. you pay for something you can't buy. you can't go to a store and buy an experience...an experience is about the people you're with...not how much it costs. an experience is something of a lifetime.

speaking of which....a week from Sunday...I will definitely be having an experience. Viva Waikiki Beach!!!!

shout out

dear a clary,
i miss you like a lot.
please call me or skype me.
love, rebecca c

oops..

well i just realized after posting that, that many of you are unfamiliar with panic/anxiety attacks. A panic attack is a period of time when you feel out of control, your heart rate is rapidly increased, you sweat like crazy, your stomach hurts, your head hurts, your breath is short, you feel claustrophobic, you can’t get away… ect. I always told my mom when I was little that "I don't feel like i'm here right now." I could not get my mind away from it. It was the weirdest, scariest thing I was experiencing.

I have suffered from panic attacks since I was in the fifth grade.

I was greatly ashamed to admit this truth about myself for years. I seriously brought myself to believe I was the only one who suffered from these. These attacks got so bad I would have to lay down and stay there for sometimes even hours at a time until I felt normal again. It was terrible. It explained my periods of depression and obsessions.

In ninth grade I was still ashamed of my condition, and still had belief that I was the only one. The only one. I was in my HPW class--and Mrs. Felix came up and talked to our class. She talked about panic attacks. My face seriously dropped when she started explaining how she felt...I could hardly believe it. Someone actually had felt the same way I was feeling. I went home that day in utter joy and told my mom that someone had actually felt my attacks!
I now elementary assist for her and I love it. She is so amazing...a wonderful woman inside and out!

I have not gone through a panic attack in over a year. I think the last time I had one was over Christmas break of last year. Amazing.
Through running and doing lots of yoga lately, I have forced myself to do deep breathing, keeping those mean attacks AWAY.
All of this to say I hope you've learned a little about something that isn't so well known. You also learned something about me today... : )
peace out girl scouts

rebe learns something new...

did you know that people who suffer from anxiety disorders or depression are shallow breathers through their diaphragm? Breathing deeply through yoga or running can encourage them to feel better. it all makes sense why people tell you to breathe deeply when you're worried...

it also makes sense why i haven't had an anxiety attack in over a year..i have been running on a regular basis and also doing lots of yoga. i am so happy to know this!