Break was really nice. I'd like another one, two... five more of those.  I have no problem only have two days of school a week. maybe it should stay this way.  Alas, three solid school weeks lie ahead of many of us, for some, even more.  Long long school days...
Thanksgiving break was wonderful.  My sister returned home for the first time since school started back up again.  We watched a lot of the office.  Ate lots of food.  Went out to eat with the family.  Painted a friends room.  Saw the movie blindside (completely recommend it),  Had lots of sleepovers, Did some good black Friday shopping, and saw/talked to a lot of people I hadn't for a while.  It was a nice break.

crazy things that are happening for the next couple weeks...
~lots of homework, tests, and papers
~babysitting
~worship team
~christmas shopping
~a week full of doctors appointments before my surgery
~and lots of fun christmas things to come!
i hope all of you have fun and blessed filled Christmas's as they approach us!

tomorrow lies the first day of December before us.  Let's not forget the real reason we celebrate the twenty-fifth of this month.  God bless you all immensely.

and you answer...

some of you may have been wondering about my post a couple weeks ago.  so here i am, 2:30 in the morning, explaining myself.

I am overwhelmed:

grace has abounded my heart.  i have learned what it means to abide in the Lord.  although, this is something i have been learning for quite some time now, and I'm learning more every given day... I read an incredible passage that brought replenishing, dug down, tears; all this out of a book that I am totally adoring...
    "There are things you've struggled with all your life--self-doubt, anger, depression, shame, addiction, fear.  You probably thought that those were your fault, too.  But they are not. They came from the Enemy who wanted to take your heart captive, make you a prisoner of darknesss.  To be sure, we complied.  We allowed those strongholds to form when we mishandled our wounds and made those vows.  but Jesus has forgiven us for all of that, and now he wants to set us free." (Captivating).

• Things we've struggled with all our life-  laura story sings a song "grace." part of the chorus in that song goes... "I ask you 'How many times will you pick me up, when I keep letting you down? and each time I fall short of your glory, how far will forgiveness abound?' you answer 'My child, I love you...'"  God understands that we struggle.  Our struggles are an inevitable truth.  

• The burden of being at fault- God has patience and a loving heart for a reason.  The burden of knowing it was all your fault is not a good feeling.  The feeling of having your family look down on you because of your unmentionable past ruins your heart.  The burdens hurt; no one is there to pick you up it feels like.  Admit the fault, failure is our nature, we all have that feeling.  *Forgive yourself*.  As this is the hardest part of getting back up, it is one of the most vital parts--> There lies another chance ahead of you.  

• Be set free- He has given us this life to live.  God meant for it to be set free of chains that tangled us, jacked us up, and screwed with our hearts.  Whether you regret something you did two minutes ago, or years ago, it has already been long gone.  In God's eyes there is no such thing you did--He removes it from His sight.  Let his love set you free-- and be thankful to our Lord who loves us so!

Love you all! I hope your thanksgiving was beautiful, and shared quality time with family/friends.  (Also sneaked some good deals in, too).  God bless your new week, and I hope you will be refreshed with his love!

start of something new

so i guess you could say a lot of things have took a new meaning to me today. i'm on a whole new level. and it has been amazing. God has revealed himself to be loving, faithful, fruitful, forgiving, kind, patient, gentle, strong, a promise...

what would we do without this mighty and loving God? the God who comforts those in sorrow. the God who bring tears of joy. the God who cries because he loves us. the God who sits upon the mountain tops, and lower than the seas.  the God who is worthy.  the God who calls us worthy, even when we're worthless sinners.

i'll have to blog more later about all of this... i am just overwhelmed.  and i hope you become overwhelmed with his presence as well.

praying and loving you all.  have a great week!

captivating

i'm reading this book.  a very profound book, that is.  see one of my friends a couple weeks ago said, that it was a must read and gave it to me to read.  let me just say, ashley, i love this book.

as i keep on reading, i see a pattern.

• we want to be pursued, we want to be loved, and simply, that's how God wired us

we are loved: God gives us an abouding love.  He gives us astonishing, beautiful, unmatching love.  Love is something we all need, if we deny it or not, somehow we need love.  a lot of times, i think we just shove the love and care that is offered to us.  i think a lot of times we think we're stronger than we really are.  i think a lot of times, we want to look like the older, wiser, bigger person, which somehow we make ourselves believe that that concept starts with not accepting love and care.

we are pursued: Just this morning at church there was a testimony, and it was incredible.  "It's not God showing these bible verses, bibles everywhere to guilt me into trusting him, it's him showing me that he's pursuing me."

just that says  a lot.  God places things in our lives that show us that he pursues us.

so my question is: will you find yourself back in the arms of his love, where he pursues us every moment? the want, the desire, it's all in us. will you accept the ultimate gift?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~i am incredibly ecstatic, because i am leaving thursday morning for my cousins wedding which is on saturday!!

~my sister is probably going to china this spring/summer with her music school, crazy!

~God has proved himself faithful, even when i'm not. which i am so not. and he still pursues... he still wants me. even when i've so far forsaken him. what a great God!

have a blessed week!

i won't settle for comfortable

lately, i have been seeing a lot of hurt.  it is a hurting time.  the more and more i think about this, the more i realize life isn't perfect.  nor, would i want it that way.  if life was pretty all the time, what would there be to trust? why would there be such a thing as faith?  


the more people i've talked to, the more i've been blown away with how many people who are hurting.


and i feel uncomfortable.


some of the stories i can relate, but some of them i can't.  
and that scares me.


see, i will confess, i wasn't blessed with words of encouragement.  i won't lie.  that's not my strength.
so most of the time, i don't say much that's super profound. but God has been speaking to me the past couple of days as i've been encountering these things...


He's told me that i was given two ears. a lot of times, people just need to let it out, and need someone to listen.  now was i given this special gift either? no.  but through some circumstances i've been in the past year, i've learned how to listen. i 've had a desire to listen.  i want those who need to talk more than i do, to talk.
God has shown me a lot through listening.  it's truly a blessing.


He's told me to never be afraid.  God spoke through moses when he had no idea what to say to those people, and God said "trust me, i will give you what to say." in situations like that, it's so hard not to know what's going to be coming out of your mouth, but God gives words.  


God will bring you to uncomfortable situations, He calls us to bless someone else with his challenges.  bless someone who is hurting.  bless someone who is hungry.  bless someone who is angry.  bless someone who is tired.  bless someone who is down.  bless someone encouraged.  bless those to whom which God has placed in your life.