dear friends,
i have some thoughts for you.
i have been constantly journaling about this
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processing it, too, by living it out every day.
this year has brought lots of change.
a lot of pain,
a lot of trust,
a lot of recreating,
a lot of prayers,
a lot of change.
in january,
everything that i knew and was familiar with
was taken away from me.
everything that i thought was safe and healthy,
was dangerous and far from healthy.
i had to start from ground zero.
no experience to go off of,
no one to confide in about this.
i was alone, afraid, and frustrated.
but, a lot of good has come out of it.
this year spiritually has challenged me.
journaling has been such an escape for me.
i have spiritually grown as a person through journaling.
i have been healing through reading scripture and journaling about it.
a new thing arose in my daily life.
and this brings me to my main point:
there are different seasons to life.
this has been a season of trusting, healing, and rebuilding.
although, to open another season you have to close the other season.
that has always been the hardest part for me.
closing what has happened.
closing the old things.
packaging them away.
it pains me, because change is hard.
it was extremely hard for me to package up that friendship and put it away.
so much had changed. and i hated it.
through processing and journaling, though, i was slowly able to move away from it,
put that season away, and take the new things that i was learning.
i am not saying i have it all figured out still, because i don't.
but i am going to say:
-i have bore more fruit than ever
-i have been able to open up a secret part of my life to 4 trusted people
-i have found my TRUE identity
-i have had some really hard times--feeling alone in a circle of friends
-i have felt really good and encouraged
-i have been able to stop being a people pleaser (sort of)
-i have been able to move on
and now i just have this remarkable story as God has been teaching me all of this:
recently i have been trying to clean out the messiest things in my room: my dressers, my closet, beside my bed, and my desk. i also realized that i was going to need a lot of boxes and things if i were going to want to keep things organized. on my desk i have this crazy assortment of cards i have received from people all over. i for some reason have never been able to take them down and put them into a box for storage. i finally realized that i needed to just that very thing. i took cards that had been sitting there for maybe even 4 years, and put them into a box and thought of how this represented a new season. putting things from the past can be so hard to put away because of how much they have meant to you, but a new season is here. a new season of life has so much to offer to you. embrace it and don't miss it while you're reflecting so much on the past, there is new to come.
there is my long post about things i have been processing and journaling about since
january. it's about time it came out.
peace
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